We don't have a small!

You go to a fast food joint and you order a small drink. "I'm sorry we don't have a small. Will a medium be OK?"

Hell no a medium won't be OK. I want a small and the cup you have with the lowest capacity is your small. You can't have a medium without a small. If medium is your smallest size then in fact, that is your small. Having a medium infers you have a small and a large or at least a small'un and uh big'un.






I would like to go south. "I'm sorry we don't have a south. Would a north be OK?" I don't think so. I was told not to trust anyone that lived north of Elizabeth City.


What really bugs me is even at the Bojangles drive through they don't get it. Now don't get me wrong, I think Bojangles is one of the best fast food places around since they do "specialize" in Southern cuisine. The drive through menu board clearly shows a small, medium and large and yet I was asked this morning if a medium was OK. It was early, I was in a good mood and all I wanted was my sausage and cheese biscuit with a small sweet tea, so no I didn't go there. One day I'll have the mystery voice on the other end of the menu board come outside and look at the word small listed in neat plastic letters for all to see. Or maybe I'll just ask for some imported, dried tea leaf beverage in the liquid refreshment container of the lowest capacity that you have in stock. I'll bet I get to talk to the Manager that morning. I hope it doesn't go on my permanent record.


One final thing comes to mind. Why is McDonald's so proud of the fact that they sell sweet tea. I'm well aware that sweet tea is a southern thing so why does McDonald's in New Bern have a "We Sell Sweet Tea" banner that takes up almost one side of the building? Most folks I know have homemade sweet tea in the fridge at home. I think I'll put up a sign at home that says "We Have Water!" Maybe Mickey Dee's would be interested in my fifteen or so half bottles of hot sauce, a partial loaf of whole wheat bread and some freshly cooked barbecued pork. Sure would pair up nicely with some of that sweet iced tea.